


Super Alien Friends

by Wolf_Cry



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Crack-ish, Gen, Mentioned Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, Multilingual Characters, Multilingualism, This escalated quickly, it seriously wasn't meant to be this long, or full on crack?, thank you tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-12
Updated: 2016-12-12
Packaged: 2018-09-08 03:36:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8828815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolf_Cry/pseuds/Wolf_Cry
Summary: Kara Danvers and J'onn J'onzz were among the last of their kind so it made sense to honor their home worlds and speak their and each other's languages, right?Right.Shame no one in the DEO knows that...





	

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by this lovely post: http://i-am-actually-trying.tumblr.com/post/153404633124/i-need-more-fanfics-of-kara-and-hank-speaking
> 
> Another thing: This fic got completely out of hand. IDK what the hell happened. This is un-betaed, finished at approximately 2:45AM. Call me out if you spot any mistakes, I will fix them ASAP.

Kara Zor-El is a genius.

Kara Danvers may act the part of a confused, naïve young woman but deep down, she was, at heart, a genius.

She has visited over a dozen planets in her childhood. She has seen the stars and the wider universe and as one of the noble House of El, a ruling family back on Krypton, Kara received the best forms of education the planet could provide.

When Krypton was lost and her parents sent her forever away, they left their beloved child with countless priceless crystals filled to the brim with wisdom and knowledge, some of which concerning her new and final destination: Earth.

Cultures, religions, languages, sciences. Some of the few subjects she covered during her _‘time’_ in the endless void that was the Phantom Zone.

Arriving on Earth and acclimating to the strange alien world, technologically centuries behind her home planet, Kara Danvers, a meek, shy and _absolutely_ average girl was born…

…until 12 years and countless failed dates later she caught an airplane with her bare hands to save her adoptive sister.

Working with the DEO alongside her Secret Agent sister to save lives and stop bad guys was right up there with her list of best things in the universe. It was right above food and that was saying something. Working with a Martian— _a GREEN Martian, really?_ —was a bonus. Someone who could sympathise and understand her pain; know what it was like to be among the last of a once-great race.

Kara Zor-El/Danvers and J’onn J’onzz were comrades in arms, battle brother and sister, survivors and family in everything but blood—not that it mattered.

They were also absolutely (albeit unknowingly) evil.

Apparently, bad guys/girls/aliens/others only ever did things on a Monday, much to Kara’s confusion. _I mean, I know everyone hates the start of the week but really?_

Annoyed, this left the Kryptonian with no other ways in delaying the inevitable: investigating and reporting on a mysterious person dressed as a rainbow rabbit that keeps popping up everywhere in National City and waving at commuters. _Thank you, Mr. Carr_. A small growl of frustration escaped the blonde dressed in her Supergirl regalia making a passing DEO Agent glance at her before scurrying away.

Looking around for something— _anything_ —to do to avoid her assignment for a little while longer, she spotted the Director’s office door open revealing the man—the Martian?—himself.

Smiling to herself she almost hopped towards the man, beaming. “Hey boss!”

He glanced briefly towards her and nodded, not stopping or altering course as he returned his attention to the data pad in his hands. “Hello, Supergirl. I’m afraid I have no new missions for you. It’s been a remarkably slow day today.”

“I can tell.” Kara continued, walking alongside the director and glancing at the tablet in his hands.

“Let me guess. You’re looking for something to do to avoid having to look around the city for a man in a kangaroo suit?”

“It’s a rainbow rabbit suit and- wait, what?” she stared wide-eyed at the director.

“Alex told me.” He said simply, trying valiantly to hide his smile.

Over by the command consoles, Winn jumped as an alert rang and windows showing footage of one of the many containment cells in the DEO building, namely a containment cell not doing that much containing anymore due to an agent’s blunder giving the extra-terrestrial the opportunity to make skin contact with the human, temporarily paralyzing him and allowing the alien to escape.

The tech specialist whirled in his wheelie chair, gulping at the sight of the stone-faced director standing mere feet away from him.

“What is the situation, Mr. Schott?”

“We, uhh- have an alien escapee at containment cell 6-A.” His raised tone at the end making it sound more like a question than a statement. He glanced meekly at Kara standing just behind the director and she shrugged at him in reply before disappearing in a blur of blonde and red.

Winn spun back around towards his screen to see Supergirl coming up behind three other agents who rushed towards the alien, not wearing the correct protective gear to deal with the creature that secreted a paralyzing toxin from its pores much to the Director’s exasperation.

Agent Danvers came up to the console and activating her ear piece, also watching the screens as Supergirl placed herself between the escapee and the agents. “Kara, be careful.”

“I got this Alex, I learned about Kanites back on Krypton.”

The Kanite lunged towards the Kryptonian intent on getting past her and the agents to escape but found itself being blown back by a freezing wind coming from the heroine. Supergirl once again moved in a blur, appearing over the disoriented Kanite and unfastening her cape from her uniform.

Within a few moments the Kanite was wrapped in the red cape, the Kryptonian not taking any chances with its toxins as she remembered the story of a Kryptonian scout ship almost being overrun by a horde Kanites when they boarded and caught the soldiers in the ship unawares. It was one of the many folktales shared around Kryptonians to keep the explorers of her race cautious and the children from straying too far when they were off-world.

Kara dragged the packaged escapee back to its cell, all the while it struggled and cursed at her through the fabric in its own guttural language.

Arriving, she hurled the alien back into the cell while holding on to one end of the cape, leaving the Kanite sprawled on the ground in a confused mess. The blonde hopped back a step and pressed the panel on the wall to close the cell, beaming happily towards the Kanite and waving before re-fastening her cape onto her uniform and heading back towards the three agents who had begun carrying the paralysed agent towards the medical bay.

When the smiling Kryptonian made it back to the command room she joined the three standing by the console and double high-fived a crowing Winn and animatedly/forced her sister to fist-bump her as the elder Danvers smiled and shook her head in fond exasperation.

Meanwhile J’onn simply patted her on the shoulder and congratulated her before turning to head back to his office muttering about how he now has to file reports on this incident and detailing explicitly how rookie agents should avoid getting themselves poisoned/blown-up/generally have their asses handed to them so much in his native Martian language.

Kara heard it all and could not help but laugh and respond back in kind, also in the Martian language, that J’onn should give a seminar on the subject and make it compulsory.

J’onn never one to turn down an opportunity to avoid paperwork and speak in his home world’s tongue smirked at the Kryptonian, though hiding his surprise that she knew Martian. **_“Perhaps you would like to attend that seminar.”_**

 ** _“Oho”_** she scoffed ** _“Is that so? Mr. Pot? Meet kettle.”_** Kara playfully huffed, crossing her arms and standing tall to facing off with the Martian who mirrored her pose.

**_“And perhaps you could help with the demonstrations on how not to approach a potentially volatile situation blindly?”_ **

**_“What?”_** Kara squawked her arms flapping at her sides.

Everyone around the duo including Winn and Alex stared concernedly at them, none being familiar with the alien language they spoke in, which coming from Kara sounded so, well, _alien_ and from J’onn it was almost like he was growling.

 **“ _Need I remind you of the snake?_ ”** Sensing he was victorious he walked off towards his office.

 ** _“That’s not fair! I was just starting out and I mean, really, who names a snake Fluffy?”_** Kara not wanting to admit defeat followed him and they continued their back and forth.

Winn and Alex glanced at each other. Winn mouth agape with a chewed-out pen frozen halfway to his mouth and Alex wide-eyed and brows furrowing. Both were the picture of confusion.

“What was that?” Winn whisper-shouted. Alex shrugged helplessly.

-0-0-0-0-0- -0-0-0-0-0- -0-0-0-0-0-

It was good, both survivors agreed, to speak once more in their home worlds’ languages.

Alex, Kara and J’onn stood at ‘The Roundtable’—as Kara dubbed it— at the centre of the command room, monitoring a DEO alien prison transfer unfolding many miles away on the screens.

 ** _“I bet $20 that something will go wrong.”_** Kara muttered over Alex’s shoulders towards J’onn. In Kryptonese.

 ** _“Are you implying that my agents cannot handle a simple prison transfer?”_** The Martian refugee whisper/growled at the blonde in the Martian language.

**_“Seven violent Fort Rozz aliens confined in one tiny-ish truck with twenty armed-to-the-teeth agents? Majority, like, six out of seven of said aliens are fully conscious because they can’t be tranquilised and are very violent against twenty humans? Did I mention they were violent?”_ **

J’onn and Kara continued their stand-off while Alex in the middle continuously switched her gaze between the two.

The Martian continued to glare at the bubbly Kryptonian, his eyes briefly flaring red as they narrowed causing the heroine to smile even wider. Alex looked on, irrationally concerned for her sister’s health.

 ** _“Fair point.”_** J’onn conceded in a low voice. They were silent for a beat, both aliens returning their attention to the screens while a very human Alex Danvers continued to be puzzled at the exchange.

Then J’onn spoke again, this time in Kryptonese. **_“$30 that I’ll get there first.”_**

Kara looked at the Director. Their faces deadly serious like it was when everyone in National City almost had their brains blown, setting Alex on edge not knowing the context of said looks.

**_“You have yourself a wager, Director Henshaw.”_ **

A distress call sounded as the monitors displaying satellite footage of the transport vehicle veering wildly. The aliens shared one last look and still stone-faced, they spun on their heels as Hank Henshaw shifted into the Martian Manhunter while Supergirl cracked her knuckles and they headed for the balcony, agents splitting hurriedly like the tide before them and leaving only their capes flapping and a stunned Alex Danvers in their wake.

-0-0-0-0-0- -0-0-0-0-0- -0-0-0-0-0-

J’onn was battered, tired and bruised. He deserved a break or at the very least a moment of respite to enjoy the simple things in life. Namely his cookie stash in the bottom drawer of his extensive filing cabinet in his office, hidden under a pile of more paperwork that he daren’t open.

He settled in his nice comfy chair. Opened the drawer, carefully lifted the stack of files and… nothing.

There were no cookies here.

The. Chocos. Were. Gone.

Growling, he slammed his palms onto his desk as he stood, his chair skittering on its wheels and hitting the wall behind him.

He _knew_ he saw a flash of long bright hair rounding the corner as he neared his office. _Is nothing sacred on this planet? Those were HIS Chocos!_

The Director found the blonde in question, predictably enough, in the Agents’ break room which was furnished with sturdy metal tables, chairs along with a few more coffee tables and couches and the essential refrigerator and coffee machines.

Kara Danvers, in full Supergirl regalia, was rifling through a fridge full of post-it noted containers of food. _No doubt looking for more food to butcher_ he scowled at her back. Possibly sensing the irritated Martian’s presence or simply hearing his approach, straightened and turned revealing a plastic container with only a two pot stickers remaining and a pair of chopsticks. One of the woman’s cheeks were puffed out with a third pot sticker wedged inside.

“Hey boss!” she chirped after chewing and swallowing. “What’s up?”

J’onn was not buying it. Only the blonde would be able to find his stash and bold enough to actually _touch_ it.

 **“Where are they?”** he rumbled in Kryptonese, enunciating each word and syllable clearly and slowly.

The low, dangerous tone of the last son of Mars drew more than a few agents’ attention that were in the break room.

 **“Where’s what?”** Supergirl smiled innocently. Daintily, as any of the noble House of El would carry themselves, she placed the second-to-last pot sticker in her mouth and resumed eating.

 **“Where. Are. My cookies?”** he said in a menacing growl. Two agents quickly vacated the break room, the others contemplating on whether they should do the same.

Understanding flooded the young Kryptonian’s features before smiled again, this time more mischievously. **“They’re gone, sorry.”** She wasn’t sorry at all.

 **“Besides,”** she continued **“those Chocos can’t be good for you. I heard they could be quite addictive.”** Kara said more seriously, nodding to herself at a fact well said.

**“Like your precious pot stickers are any better? Is that even meat in there or is it highly processed mattress stuffing?”**

**“It has cabbage in it!”**

**“Fried in oil and drenched in grease! It counteracts any healthy effect the vegetable may have had!”** J’onn almost snarled, his voice growing louder sending three more agents scurrying for the exit.

 **“They’re made and cooked fresh every day! Your Chocos probably have probably been in that drawer for months and have so many preservatives in them they can last through a nuclear winter!”** The blonde’s own voice rose as well.

 **“Three. Days. They’ve been there for three days!”** The Martian was definitely snarling now.

The remaining agents abruptly got up and left.

 

* * *

** BONUS I: **

 

Alex and Winn were stopped on their way to the break room by a flood of seasoned DEO agents walking away from it, some almost frantically.

“What’s going on?” Alex called out.

Vasquez paused by her. “Director Henshaw and Supergirl are talking in their growly alien languages. They look like they’re ready to wail on each other, ma’am.” The agent said brusquely before hurrying on past the stunned duo.

The two looked to one another, then towards the break room and then back to each other again. As one, they too turned on their heels and walked away.

“Hey Alex, Noonan’s for lunch?”

“Actually, I was going to go meet Maggie…”

The tech specialist whistled, “Bad-ass Detective Maggie Sawyer, ooh la la” he sing-songed, bobbing and weaving his upper body as they walked.

Alex punched Winn in the arm. Hard.

 

* * *

 

** BONUS II: **

 

“Well… oops.” Kara smiled sheepishly at the irate man.

“You want the last mattress-flavoured pot sticker?” She raised the container and wiggled it lightly, the pot sticker sliding around.

The Director huffed lightly before grabbing the pot sticker, shoving it into his mouth as he left the break room.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Firstly: Hi! Yes I am alive and no I haven't forgotten about my other story May We Meet Again, I've simply been very busy and the second chapter is sitting half-done on my hard drive for the past nearly-year (OMFG 2016 is nearly over wAT)
> 
> Hopefully writing this fic will get me back in the groove of writing in general. It has been a loooong while since I wrote something purely for the joy of writing. (I think I've said that before too... oh well)
> 
> Secondly: I made Kanites up. As far as I know there are no such things in either Marvel or DC universes. I based the Kanite loosely on the Kanima. (Yes I watch that too *wink wink*)
> 
> Please do leave a comment good/bad/anything, I'm a tough cookie, I can handle it.
> 
> PS- This work in unbeta-ed, all mistakes are my own.
> 
> PPS- I'm back to thinking up of very un-imaginative and horrible story titles. (or did I ever actually stop?)


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